I was going through my pictures, and I found a picture of the cake that Cassidy made for us for our 25th wedding anniversary party. A beautiful fun filled party that our children gave us. Susi put it together and worked so hard. We were so surprised and grateful for good friends and family that came from so far away.
I got looking at that picture and thinking about interracial marriage. Interracial marriage is not very common, however, more common now than 35 years ago when we were married. I can remember saying to my mother that I could marry the boy next door and it could be considered an “interracial marriage” that “color” wasn’t the only indicator of differences.
Eti and I were advised not to marry. We were told that we came from two different worlds. (duh) We were told that it would be way too difficult, that Eti was too Samoan, and I was too American. (?) Well, I’m not going to lie, there have been some difficult times. Has it been worth it? Absolutely! My life has been so diverse and full. I’ve been exposed to many different cultural experiences. I have learned how to be more patient and kind. I have learned that there are some things that really just don’t matter.
Would I recommend an interracial marriage? Well it would depend on the circumstance and who the marriage was between. Like any marriage, there is a lot of give. There is no room for selfishness, or the idea that my way is better. I remember comparing Eti to my father and it seemed like an unfair comparison. Now I know that it was unfair. They are two different people. Daddy had many wonderful skills, but so does Eti. They are different skills but worthwhile skills.
I have watched each of my daughter-in-laws make that same comparison. I have watched each of them learn and grow and recognize that we are all a work in progress. Hopefully we’ll all continue on and perfect ourselves regardless of where we came from.
Interracial marriage is not for the weak at heart, but it does produce beautiful babies.
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